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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23927992">Vored From Relevance: The Tail Of Yiffany Longstocking!</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Varynova/pseuds/Varynova'>Varynova</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Homestuck</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Body Horror, Candy Divorce Fever, Candy Timeline, Canon Trans Character, Cheating, Chronic Illness, Discussion of Abortion, Discussion of Ciscentrism, Discussion of Transmedicalism, Discussion of dysphoria, Earth C (Homestuck), F/F, Genital dysphoria, Post-Canon But I Guess Not Anymore, Pregnancy, Sadstuck, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Unplanned Pregnancy, Vomiting, migraines</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 21:41:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,797</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23927992</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Varynova/pseuds/Varynova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sure, we heard the fairy tale version of how Rose and Jade came together, coupled, progenated, and dissolved their bond again. Pity it couldn't be shown onscreen, no?</p><p>Or perhaps it's not a pity, because maybe it didn't happen exactly as they've explained. Allow me to elaborate.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jade Harley/Dave Strider (minor), Jade Harley/Rose Lalonde, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Thanks to <a href="https://twitter.com/aslanZounder">Sofi</a> and my partner Mara for beta-reading this work.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <h3>1. PROLOGUE.</h3><p>Fairy tales about princesses have a very particular way of beginning. No, not the 'once upon a time' bit. That merely sets the tone. Whether the princess in question is wanted or not, stories about them always begin with their teenagehood as it is spent on some gravely unhappy toil: under the claws of some wicked stepsisters, in the dominion of an evil dragon, attracting the envy of a monstrous witch, or fast asleep in a tall, tall tower.</p><p>Never do they begin with a sudden bout of unexplained nausea, two jags of sobbing over a toilet awaiting the foreboding appearance of twin lines on a paper strip, and a harried phone call after a wife has gone to work.</p><p>This one does have such a beginning, however, because it is not a story about a princess, merely a very, very unhappy little girl.</p>
<h3>2. THE PHONE CALL.</h3><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose!! hiiiiii! its good to hear from you</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: whats up?? :D</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Yes. Jade... Ah, I'm calling because there's something that you deserve to know.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Things are... about to change. Not just between us, I fear.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: haha rose i really dont get what youre talking about!</span></span></p><p>A moment passes.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: (Christ.)</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: (I can't do this over the phone.)</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: :?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: We need to talk.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: In person.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: oh hoho i see ;)</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: well you know how to get over to my place! daves in his room today so i dont think well see much of him, if we wanted to cook something</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade, that's rather not what I--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i assume kanayas busy today? and vriskas at daycare?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade, I'm...</span></span></p><p>Rose sniffles, voice hitched in her throat. Jade has heard her lose composure like this only once before, when ambushed with news of the death of her mother. Rose sounds, Jade thinks, just like that scared little girl from all those years ago.</p><p>
  <span class="text">
    <span class="rose">ROSE: Yes, I'll be over shortly. Put some tea on, if you would.</span>
  </span>
</p>
<h3>3. THE KITCHEN TABLE.</h3><p>The late morning sun pours through the high cabin windows of Jade Harley's home, dancing a thin glimmer off of each mote of dust overhead like dewdrops hanging in air. Since Karkat left, Jade has taken to drawing back the thick curtains every morning to let her plants get some sunlight, despite Dave's more-than-sporadic insistence that it disrupts his night owl aesthetic.</p><p>Jade hears the screen door's complaintive squeak just as she pours the fresh-boiling water into her teapot, a moulded brown clay dog, its dopey eyes and tongue frozen in a stare. Dave had given it to her, his only gift in all their time dating. She bounds down the single riser from the open kitchen into the living room, but freezes just short of her usual pouncing hug. She watches Rose's gaze drag across the recessed lights in the ceiling, averted at all costs from meeting Jade's eyes.</p><p>Surely nothing a hug can't fix, Jade thinks, and cranes herself down to embrace her paramour. But Rose recoils, tensing up.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: its been a little while!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im really glad you called today :D</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Yes. Just under three weeks, in fact.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Hence my visit.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: been really busy with baby vriska, huh??</span></span><br/>
Rose doesn't respond, lips pursed, as she heads toward her usual stool at the high table.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: well you wanted some tea, so i made you some tea!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I don't suppose it's been decaffeinated, or...?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: no? its the same kind you usually like, does it matter?</span></span><br/>
Rose chuckles to herself, joylessly.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well, I believe they say people in my position should try to limit their intake of caffeine. If I recall correctly.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i mean ive only ever heard that being a thing for pregnant people</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose what is this big news youre here to give me exactly</span></span></p><p>Rose merely folds her hands together at this, staring down into her empty teacup.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: are you pregnant</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I suppose that depends. What's the likelihood of a pregnancy test producing a false positive in a twenty-four year old woman who's never been pregnant before?</span></span><br/>
Jade's face falls.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: not high</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: even with complicating factors its not statistically likely</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well then, you and I have a problem.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ohh</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: so thats what you...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Yes.</span></span></p><p>Jade hears her sigh rattle in the still air before she realizes how it must sound, how her face must read. She blinks, and reaches for the teapot, pouring a long stream of oolong into a glass, as if having her paws full will somehow make the silence less pervasive. As if the steam billowing above the table will replace the oxygen displaced by Rose's words. But all it succeeds in doing is obscuring her view of the blonde girl with her head in her hands.</p><p>Finally, Jade speaks.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: how long have you known?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I've suspected for a few days. But I only received confirmation moments before I called.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and... you think its mine</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE:</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: right</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: sorry silly question</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: so... how are you feeling right now?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: How would one be expected to feel were one made suddenly aware of such a curse?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: How did Crataiis feel upon birthing the bane of mortals?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: :\ cmon rose</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i know this isnt what we agreed would happen but</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: is it really that bad?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: couldnt it... work out like we talked about?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I said no, Jade. I meant it then, and I mean it now.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: but does kanaya know?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No. Not yet.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: so if youre in this position anyway...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i promise you wouldnt ever have to see it</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i can just make something up to tell kanaya! nobody ever has to know</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No. I'm going to tell her; she deserves that much.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I only did you the courtesy of coming over here so that, in case I can never bear to speak to you again, you'll know what happened.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose dont talk like that! D:</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im sure well be able to work something out, between the three of us!!</span></span></p><p>Rose rises from the table for a moment, procuring a glass of cool, clear water, and produces a pair of tablets from a pocket on her dress. She downs them dry, chasing them with a quick gulp of water before reseating herself and fixing her gaze on the doggirl facing her.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade, there is no 'three of us'.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: This isn't your decision.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: thats just not fair!!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Fair?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: And what on Earth do you mean by that?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Was it 'fair' when Skaia decided that I needed reconfiguration upon my emergence from the Green Sun, and had this forced upon me?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Or was it completely arbitrary for the powers that be to decide my capacity for reproduction?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i dont know!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: no of course that wasnt fair</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: but you know what wasnt fair either??</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: because if were blaming skaia for the consequences of the game then</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: youre not the only one who gets to pity herself over losing out on having control over her own body!!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I don't say this out of self-pity, you know. But I don't believe that either of our outcomes were necessary preconditions to some grander plan that Paradox Space demands fulfilled. This isn't the alpha timeline, and I'd rather move on and try to live my life without miring myself in regret.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: then why do we have to rehash this conversation</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: you know how i feel about how things ended up!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I'm sorry. Yes, I know. I know that it's hard.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: HARD??</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose i constantly feel like a MONSTER! how bad do you think i have it if i already know im just too much for most people to bear even BEFORE we get into the fact that ive literally got werewolf parts!! a tail! the ears! and--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ive had to look down every single day since i was thirteen and acknowledge that yep, not only is it still there, but ive got to live with the fact that my BEST FRIEND got everything *I* wanted from going god tier while at the same time the universe decided to mock me with--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Dammit, Jade! I'm sorry that you feel this way, I really am! But that doesn't entitle you to an exclusive claim on misery.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Case in point.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: oh god</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: oh god rose youre pregnant</span></span></p><p>Jade slumps. Rose exhales through clenched teeth, putting a stiff hand against Jade's elbow across the table. Pap, pap.</p><p>Thankfully, footsteps at the living room stairs cause Rose to pull back her appendage, and Jade perks up again.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: heyyy dave didnt expect to see you today :D</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: oh shit i thought youd be out of the house by now</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: guess with my best dude not around its pretty easy for me to lose track of what day it is</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: not like thats possible because guess what im still the god of time and all</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: oh hey rose what brings you to chateau dave n pupsters</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: formerly davekat manor i guess but</span></span><br/>
A low, almost imperceptible growl rumbles in Jade's throat. If either of the Strilonde siblings notice it, however, neither betrays that fact.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well. My last few weeks have been so entirely captivated with the care of my toddler since Kanaya returned to work that I simply haven't had a chance to catch up with my dear friend Jade.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: yeah ever since the funeral its just been one long party up in this place</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: whatever it takes to keep our minds on all the great positive stuff weve got going for us</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: like the political situation or the fact that all of our friends are pairing off and having babies by the dozens</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: can we not</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: right now</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: dave</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: please</span></span></p><p>Dave's friends have known him long enough to discern between sincere apathy and the desire to probe restrained only by his cool Strider exterior. Rose sees it in his eyebrow's quirk, and Jade in the momentary tightening of his lip. He shrugs, scratching his shirtless abdomen.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: cool</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: well ill let you get back to reminiscing then</span></span></p><p>Bowl of cereal procured, he makes his exit from the kitchen once more.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="dave">DAVE: got my own irons in the fire today anyway</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: see ya later hon :D</span></span></p><p>Jade's boyfriend doesn't respond, but her grinning mask doesn't crack until he's upstairs and she hears the door shut behind him. Her shoulders melt a little, and her smile gives way to expressionlessness once again.</p><p>Rose lets her own shoulders relax, and puts out a hand. Jade takes it reflexively.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I am.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Sorry, I mean. I'm glad that, at the very least, the ways that Skaia fucked us both over brought us closer together.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: its nice</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: being able to talk to another trans woman my age</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: knowing that weve had these wildly different experiences</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: but that even if they make no sense we have each other</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It was certainly more than a silver lining.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Not that it wasn't already a perk to have somebody so absolutely enamored with me to share time with.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: heh</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: see, its not so bad!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: heck</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ive been thinking about it, the only time we even had sex recently was three weeks ago, right?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: so if you got pregnant then and its already progressed this fast, maybe itll be a nice quick gestational period and you wont even have to be pregnant for very long</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Oh, either way I don't think it's liable to last long.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i meant that maybe you just wont hate this as much as youre afraid you might</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: maybe it ends up being good for you!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: plus isnt it so cute to imagine what theyre gonna look like??</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose, our own litter of puppies! :D :D</span></span></p><p>Rose wrinkles her nose with a frown.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Just stop.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Stop trying to turn this situation to your advantage. I don't find it amusing to be used like that.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i just mean</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No. It doesn't matter what you meant. I said no to being your surrogate because I didn't want this.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: but its the perfect solution to your problem, right here!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: its not like dave knows about us but i know hell be thrilled once he hears about this!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and well tell kanaya and im sure shell understand! between the three of--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: !</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: There is still!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: 'Three of us'!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: This is a decision I need to make with my wife.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: The two of us, alone.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Despite your ongoing efforts to insinuate yourself into my marital bed.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: god of course i am! no shit!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose i love you!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No, you don't.</span></span></p><p>Jade's ears flatten against the top of her head, eyes burning with betrayal. Rose soldiers forth regardless.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Do you know what your problem is, Jade? For as long as I've known you, you've been so willing to let others reshape you as they saw fit that you lost sight of who you needed to be at the end of it. You let yourself be shoved aside for the good of the timeline, and eventually decided that no matter what happened you could cope, and grow stronger from everything it inflicted on you.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Even worse, once you accepted that your pain was necessary for the propagation of Paradox Space, you told yourself it was an active good. That you’d receive the reward due to you as soon as the game ended.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: So you attached yourself to my brother, but he didn't reciprocate your affections. And I'm sorry for that! But just because you’re lonely doesn't mean you're entitled to a space in my marriage.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: wow rose</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: glad youve got me all figured out!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: otherwise all this psychobabble would just sound like a way to justify to yourself that its okay to leave</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: ...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: The time I’ve spent with you has been...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: An enjoyable excursion from my everyday life.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: thats all it was huh</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Yes! What were you hoping for? I've enjoyed myself! But it remains, foremost, a diversion. It isn't something I would like to jeopardize my family for. My wife and daughter have to come first.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade, you don't love me. And, frankly?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I don't love you, either.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: well i guess youd know better than i would</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im sorry for whatever i did that makes you so sure</span></span></p><p>Jade recoils like a wounded labrador, legs drawn up to her chest as if trying to make herself as small as possible. Rose tosses her bangs out of her eyes with a hand, and sighs, pushing herself up from the rustic planks of Jade's breakfast table in preparation for a wordless departure. But she can't hold herself back, throwing one final pitying glance in Jade's direction.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Before I go, I just want to make one thing very clear.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: ...Has your light fixture always been that bright?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Ugh... I feel a little--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose!!</span></span></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <h3>4. THE MARYAM-LALONDE PARLOR.</h3><p>Rose Maryam-Lalonde has been premonition-free for just over a year. In that time, she has experienced only the normal amount of headaches, used only the normal amount of aspirin, been only the normal amount of adorably annoyed by the light streaming through the bedroom door during her wife's midnight trips to the fridge.</p><p>She awakens with the taste of iron lingering like a wraith at the back of her throat. Today’s headache wasn't due to a portent, Rose thinks, though it was accompanied by the same needle-like pain between the eyebrows, the same auras, the nausea, the debilitating surge of overwhelming white.</p><p>Even now, the dull thrum pressing out from Rose's frontal lobe has yet to ebb, blanketing every sensation in static. Sharp lights overhead wedge themselves into the cracks in her eyelids, prising them open just like that day so recently in the hospital. But now, instead of a comfortable bed, she's lying on the ivory-colored couch in her front room, and her hand is being stroked not by her wife but by the woman she just tore into in her own prairie-style kitchen.</p><p>She groans, and Jade snaps to attention.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: oh thank god</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Wh- what happened...?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: you fainted</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: just as you were about to leave my house</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: You brought me home?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i couldnt think of what else to do!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i mean i couldnt take you to the hospital</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i didnt know if you wanted to risk it getting out like that</span></span></p><p>Getting out. Like the identity of a bank robber, or the location of a rebel hideout. That's what I've been reduced to, Rose thinks, not even the suave revolutionary but the skulking animal, desperate to bury her passions in the dirt.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: And you thought returning to my living room was a more subtle place to await my return to consciousness.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: look i panicked okay!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: it was that or stay at my place! and would this be any easier with dave butting in??</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: besides it sounds like youve got your mind made up to tell kanaya anyway</span></span></p><p>Rose sighs.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Aah. About that.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Back when I was... very sick, I had one of my predictions, usual in every sense save that it was further-flung and less Relevant than most.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It was of Roxy, deeply pregnant-- with Harry Anderson, it's since become clear-- just... thinking, watching a sunset on her own.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">That's the thing about prognostication. It wasn’t just words and images. Particularly vivid ones intruded with smells, textures, even... emotions, the feelings of somebody appearing in them.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: So I just knew that no matter what, she felt like it made sense to her, that what her body was doing was just so deeply...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Right.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Like a machine finally achieving its function.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Suffice it to say, I've never had anxiety over whether or not I would ever feel that sort of bodily concordance with my own uterus.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: That simply will never be the case for me. I've never sought it out, yearned for it, or even thought about it. It was just so clearly not applicable.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: well i can certainly imagine what it would feel like</span></span></p><p>Rose's voice trembles, but she continues.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: When Kanaya and I decided to raise Vriska as our own, I thanked my lucky stars that I would never have to risk pregnancy. When you and I... became intimate, I ensured that we took appropriate precautions, and resigned myself to the fact that 'never' became 'almost certainly not'.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: So you will have to forgive my outburst, earlier. But this is somewhat a worst-case scenario for me.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Even without considering...</span></span></p><p>She rises to an elbow, rubbing a temple with two fingers.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well, suffice it to say that should I become debilitated in the near future to the degree I was in April of last year, this scenario will have successfully progressed from 'worst-case' to unfathomably difficult.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im sorry</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i shouldve thought of that when i asked if youd consider giving the baby to me</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Yes. But I can comprehend your optimism, even as I don't share it.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: However, Jade, the most likely scenario is that I will terminate the pregnancy. It's a rather unbearable thought to consider this getting worse.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i understand</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: of course, do what you need to do</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: its your body</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: but...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Hm?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: are you certain itll be...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i mean given all the factors at play here</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: if its really been almost three weeks and progressing this fast youre probably entering the equivalent of the second trimester</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: we dont really know what all god tier does to anybodys biology, least of all somebody whos been transitioned by the game</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: the fact that im half dog, so the baby is a quarter</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: that nobodys gone through the gestation process you have exactly, and your history of really serious illness thats recurring with this pregnancy</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im not sure any doctor would risk putting you through that medical procedure without delaying to run some tests</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and by that point in time it might not be possible at all</span></span></p><p>Rose is silent, then, lips pursed, hands unmoving. She eventually lays back down on the couch with a sigh.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I see.</span></span><br/>
She closes her eyes once more, taking a deep breath.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well, I had hoped Kanaya would never have to find out. I had intended to seek medical intervention before I was forced to inform her, but I have to admit that I hadn't fully considered this stymieing point.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: so when you said you and kanaya were going to make that decision without me...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: that was just a lie then</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: :\</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Would an apology help? Kanaya might be home any time, now, and I'm still too weak to stand.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Does it change anything, knowing I would've ended our relationship regardless?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ughhhhh</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i guess not...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Would you rather we waste time wallowing in what's done, or ought we spend our time coming up with a contingency plan?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It's not like I hadn’t at least considered a scenario where you and I raise this child, far from the prying eyes of a single prurient soul, even my wife.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Certainly, more implausible events have occurred.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Imagine, we'll build it a homestead to live in, a place we can visit any time we need to.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: The child will have access to every bit of technology and knowledge any other child of Earth-C has, even should it need to be removed from the environment of its peers.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: We can educate it ourselves in every aspect a normal child would need; you on the sciences and its body, me on matters literary, sociological, philosophical.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: </span></span><span class="tinytext"><span class="jade">(rose...)</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: When you're not busy taking care of Dave, you can lend your time to it--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose!! :\</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: stop calling my baby it! its gonna be a REAL PERSON!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and i dont 'take care of' dave! hes my boyfriend</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: ...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and more importantly--</span></span><br/>
Jade chokes up, and her voice goes quiet. Flat.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: it sounds like youre proposing that we raise her completely alone despite a world full of people</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: with just a bunch of tech around to keep her company</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and at best only little windows into the lives of the people her age</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: watching as they grow up without her and completely pass her by</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I'll admit, when you put it like that it sounds--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: it sounds exactly like my own childhood</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose i couldnt wish that on anybody not ever</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: much less do it to my own kid</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I'm not sure we have a choice.</span></span></p><p>Jade's ears droop, and Rose rolls with effort to face her.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yknow i cant stand you sometimes</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i cant believe youd imagine pulling all this over on your own wife</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: That's rich, given how enthusiastic you were for our conduct before we were confronted with the notion that she might find out.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: dont change the subject</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: try to convince me all you want but i remember what my childhood was like</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: one tragedy, then a bunch of loneliness</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: waiting for my real life to start after id been promised that there would be so much to look forward to!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and i even had friends to chat with to pass the time</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: and a cool dream robot</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: but maybe youre right </span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: maybe at least our daughter will grow up with two loving moms and at least there IS a world for her to discover, if at a distance</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: maybe we could even sneak her off to some school where nobody would ask who her moms were or pry into her funny ears, or prod her on why she didnt act like the other kids on account of having been raised in isolation</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: okay that part might take some tweaking but at least you have a plan</span></span><br/>
Jade relaxes her back against the couch, and she feels Rose’s thumb rub reassuringly against the saddle of her palm.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: right rose</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: maybe im ready to hear more about your plan</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: also wait when is kanaya going to be home</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Aah, that depends. What time is--</span></span><br/>
Then, the door bursts open, and in strides Kanaya, with little Vriska in her arms, utterly steaming.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Darling</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Why Have You Not Answered Your Phone This Entire Afternoon</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Where Were You I Mean Vriska Needed To Be Picked Up Almost An Hour Ago And</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Received A Call From That Kind Fellow At The Daycare Center By The Name Of Infant Rearer And He Said That You Had Yet To</span></span></p><p>Kanaya pauses mid-stride, slowly beginning to process the scene in front of her: her wife, strewn on the sofa, cheeks sallowed and pale; her dear friend Jade, unexpectedly present, seated on the floor beside her; and both of them with their gazes pointedly diverted anywhere but each other, or the interloping mother and child. She sees Jade's hand slither back into her lap from atop Rose's, as if if it had been protecting its sleeping form from predators.</p><p>Her pace slows. Her eyes narrow.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Are You Unwell</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: What Has Transpired Here</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: she collapsed</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Merely Physically Or Was She Unconscious</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yeah for a little while</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: No Jade</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: This Is Important How Long</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: long enough for me to bring her home</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i wasnt exactly counting the seconds :/</span></span><br/>
Kanaya sighs.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Have You Been Attentive To Her Blood Pressure</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Is She In Any Pain</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It's alright.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Kanaya, I'm fine, really.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Disagree If Youve Collapsed Again</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And What Transpired Immediately Prior</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Were You Exerting Yourself Or Did You Experience Any</span></span></p><p>The word lodges itself in her throat. Vriska coos, arms flailing for an uncoordinated, spit-covered hug, and Kanaya shushes her, bouncing her up and down on her hip. This elicits a giggle.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: we were in my house</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: just talking</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: she turned to go and she asked why the lights were too bright</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: then she fell over</span></span></p><p>Kanaya's eyes dart to Jade's, still averted.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Jade I Am Rather Asking</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: If We Are Capable Of Discerning The Specific Cause Of This Fainting Spell</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: kanaya :(</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose fainted! and i brought her home!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im worried about her!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: As Am I</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Doubly So If This Means Her Visions Are Returning</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Must Insist We Seek Out A Physician Immediately In Case It Should Become Inexplicably And Suddenly Worse</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It's alright! I merely fainted. I'll eat a substantial lunch. Everything is fine.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose I Have Never Known You To Simply Throw Your Hands Up And Insist Nothing Is The Matter</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: When Clearly Something Is Indeed The Matter</span></span></p><p>A palpable silence arises from the two women at the couch, thick like woodsmoke.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Its Very Unlike You To Attempt Keeping Secrets From Me Rose</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: At Least The Sort As Poorly Conceived As This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Unless What Youre Concealing Is The Nature Of</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Of what?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Please</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Know I Usually Refrain From Prying Regarding Your Whereabouts During My Absences</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: But Despite My Implicit Trust Know That This Sudden Evasiveness Does Not Defray My Suspicions</span></span><br/>
Rose shifts uncomfortably, flattening herself against the sofa.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: So Again I Must Ask</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: If What Appears To Be Occurring Right Before My Eyes</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Is Indeed The Case</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ...not anymore its not</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: thats what rose was doing right as she was leaving my house</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: she ended things</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: then she fainted</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: we had been but its over now</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Aah Well Then</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Come Now Vriska I Believe Its Time For You To Go Play In Your Room</span></span></p><p>Kanaya plops down the toddler in her arms, who-- as girls proud of their newfound ability to run are want to do-- takes off with a hoot, and Kanaya leaves to guide her into her room and locate some means of distraction from the grownups' conversation.</p><p>Jade and Rose are silent until her return, sharing a glance of consternation. When she comes back, Kanaya crosses her arms, standing above them like a schoolmatron displeased at a rebellious display. When she speaks, it isn't... cold, exactly, merely measured, precise.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: So</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Ill Kindly Hold Off On The Scolding Remarks For The Time Being</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Had Hoped It Wouldnt Come To This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Had Worked To Put This Notion Completely From My Mind Since Even The Barest Iota Would Doubtlessly Eat Away At Me Like A Flesh Eating Microbe</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: You thought I might... be cheating on you?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: The Possibility Had Occurred To Me</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: The Long Evenings Away</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: The Ridiculous Excuses</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: (A Poetry Journal Rose Really)</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Clearly Not Without Good Reason</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well, I would take offense, except...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Indeed</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: So The Only Remaining Query I Have For You As To This Little Display</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Is Why</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Dear Would You Kindly Explain What On Earth C Possessed You To Engage In Such A Tryst</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Rather straightforwardly? Because Jade needed me.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Kanaya, you know how wonderful that feels, to be needed.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: This all only began after the other Jade's funeral, you know.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: You all had just been taunting me over my inability to provide comfort...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: And there was my closest human friend, able to engender no succor from her partner.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: You never needed me in the way that I needed you. That Jade needed me, and still does.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: So, yes. I indulged myself. What else was I to do?</span></span></p><p>All the while Jade merely watches, with those great wet green puppy-dog eyes.</p><p>Kanaya's eyebrows rise, followed by her shoulders.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Believe My Response To Be Obvious</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: But Be That As It May I Find Myself In Need Of One Clarification</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Did You Have Motivations Other Than Pity</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Or Was That Enough Exclusively</span></span><br/>
She shoots a withering glance at the subject of said pity. Jade whimpers.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: No! ...Not exclusively. I can't say that I didn't throw myself into it earnestly.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Having Finally Come To Your Senses Enough To End It</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: The Stress Got To You And You Collapsed In Your Lovers Home</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Precisely.</span></span><br/>
Kanaya lets the pause drag on, perfectly comfortable in letting the silence speak for her.</p><p>Jade, however, is not.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: rose i cant take this its excruciating</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: if you dont say it at this point i will</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Fine.</span></span><br/>
Rose props herself upright with effort, trying to at least do the courtesy of looking her wife in the eye.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It would be visible in the next few weeks, anyway. No use trying to run from it.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: You see, the reason I chose to end it now...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: As well as the reason I collapsed...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Kanaya, I'm pregnant.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It's Jade's. And she believes that given the... idiosyncrasies of the situation it won't be possible to abort.</span></span></p><p>Kanaya's look of shock is almost enough to knock the serving trays off the platerails overhead. Her pointed back teeth visibly grate in her mouth as her face transforms through a series of expressions, each more distraught and aggrieved than the last, but settling into a stonelike glare aimed squarely at her matesprit.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Kanaya, sweetheart, please don't be angry.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Pardon Me For Perhaps Not Understanding Then</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: For Clarification</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Since Our Child Was Perhaps A Year Old</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: You Have Been Engaging In A Covert Affair With Your Oldest Friend</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Despite Your Long Held Insistence Of A Disinterest In Physical Procreation</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Have Become Pregnant With Her Child</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It wasn't deliberate! It's not like I was trying for this outcome, just--</span></span><br/>
But Rose falters, seeing her wife cover her mouth with the palm of her hand. Kanaya’s head falls with a cry of anguish as she is unable to hold back the tears any longer.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Please Inform Me As To Which Portion Of This Revelation Is Intended To Distress Me Least</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade sought me out some time ago asking if I'd be willing to bear her a child as a surrogate mother. I turned her down at that juncture, but at the very least it-- she, the child-- won't go unloved.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: And I'm more than happy to assist her in all the duties that go along with--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Is Now The Precise Moment At Which Honesty Is Finally Called For</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I'm... I'm sorry.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Kanaya, I've been selfish. The affair, misleading you, and now these complications... This was all so selfish of me.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Selfish</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Rose Selfish Does Not Begin To Cover This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: From Now On Every Time I Recall Some Pleasant Evening Spent With Our Child</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Every Time I Fed Her</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Bathed Her</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Sat On Her Floor And Sang The Quiet Songs That Lulled Her To Sleep</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: If You Were Not Right Beside Me I Will Wonder</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Was Rose In Jades Arms That Night</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: At That Moment</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: As I Cradled Our Infant And Read Her Stories</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Was My Wife Fucking Jade Harley</span></span></p><p>She practically growls this. Silence is the only reply; Rose's eyes have dropped to the floor. Jade's whole body is slumped against the arm of the couch, unable to weather any more.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Truly Do Wish You Had Merely Mocked Me To My Face</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Have In Me Adequate Replies For That Sort Of Confrontation</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And That At Least Affords Me The Dignity Of An Even Footing</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: But This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Well</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I See What Im Worth To You</span></span></p><p>She sighs.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Must Go Tend To Our Daughter While You Finalize This Dalliance</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Jade</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: When You Have Gone From My Home This Afternoon</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Know This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Wish Earnestly To Never See Your Face Again</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Know This Desire Will Go Unfulfilled For Our Mutual Social Circle</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: However For Tonight I Believe I Deserve At Least This Small Consideration</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: of course</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ill be out of your hair forever just as soon as i can be sure rose is ok</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Good</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Shall See To Her Convalescence In The Coming Weeks</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Much As I Have For The Last Several Years</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: As For Your Soon To Be Offspring Know This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Should I Ever Be Queried Regarding The Babys Existence I Will Deny All Knowledge</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Doubly So For Any Inkling Of Roses Involvement</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Will Not Be Belittled By An Uncaring World So Ravenous For Rifts Between Its Troll And Human Founders</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Nor Will I Allow This Circumstance To Be Used For Politicking Or One Of Janes Vile Stunts</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: of course not!! D:</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: No Jade I Am Not Certain You Understand</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Should Rose Not Be Well Enough To Assist You</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Would You Raise This Child With Dave</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i mean</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yes that was kind of my hope</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: if we cant be the harlondyams i was going to rely on him</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And What Should Occur If In His Grief He Could Not Maintain The Veil Of Subterfuge Necessary</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i--</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Dave Cannot Know</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Surely You Are Aware That Tasking Him With The Responsibilities Of Childrearing Would Only Make Him Drift Further From You</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: further?</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Jade</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: its not my fault dirk died and karkat pushed us both away!!</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i have to stay here for him so why</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: WHY cant i just have this</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: You Know Very Well Why</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Much As You Know Why Your</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Harlondyam Fantasy Will Never Come To Pass</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: But In Case You Should Wonder For A Moment On Some Winters Night</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: What Exactly You Have Done To Drive Rose From Your Arms Rather Than To Have Us Both Present To Assist In Raising Your Child</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: It Was Never Your Affections</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: From My Life Among Trollkind I Can Assure You That Bothers Me Not A Whit</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Either Of You Could Have Brought This To My Attention</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Should You Have Merely Voiced Your Desires Jade</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Or Rose Your Dissatisfactions With Whatever Went So Sour In Our Marriage</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: We Could Have Sought A Solution</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: No</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: What Ruined The Whole Realm Of Possibility Between The Three Of Us</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Was Your Shared Belief That I Mattered So Little That You Could Imagine To Undertake All This</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Without Considering Me Enough To Even Feel Properly Ashamed Of Yourselves</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: ...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ...</span></span></p><p>Kanaya draws a handkerchief from the pouch within her sash, and gently pats down her besotten eyes, with not a smear of makeup out of place.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yeah</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yeah youre right</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: im so sorry kanaya</span></span></p><p>Kanaya sighs, sagging into a nearby armchair. She looks drained, like an umbrella after a torrential downpour, wrung out and soggy.</p><p><span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Jade</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Of All Beings Cannot Fault In You</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: That Implacable Desire To Procreate</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And While It Pains Me To Acknowledge That I Can Have No Part In The Life Of A Child Borne By My Own Spouse For The Perpetual Shame I Would Feel To Merely Look Into Its Eyes</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Do Not Blame You</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: kanaya</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: arent you...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: mad?</span></span><br/>
Kanaya laughs a bitter, distraught laugh.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Of Course I Am Mad</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Feel Betrayed</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Hurt</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Like The Trust I Have For My Wife Has Been Rent Apart</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: At The Very Least Irreparably Shaken</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: And Yet</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Her Health Must Come First</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Can Set Aside My Anger</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Perhaps In Time Even Forgive Her</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Im Sure You Would Do The Same In My Position</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: :/ well rose sure seems to think i would</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Pardon</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Jade, not now.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yes rose now</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: dont think ive forgotten what you said about me</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: youre right that im happy to help people when they need it even if it means i have to make sacrifices</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: like the kind it sounds like kanayas ready to make for you</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: even if they can only see themselves making 'diversions' for me</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: youre very lucky</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: yknow not everybody could fold themselves small enough to play the part of your wounded spouse and still take care of you like she does</span></span></p><p>Rose is silent. As Kanaya makes her exit, Jade shudders, pent up sorrow finally leaking out, and she rises and begins to go. Rose stands as well, and rests an unsteady hand on Jade's shoulder, brow knit with apology.</p><p>As she leaves, Jade walks past the tree of magnolias in the front yard, in full lily-pink bloom; she had planted it on their arrival to this planet at Rose's behest. When the sun shines on it, she thinks, the leaves and bark take on a lovely verdant color, almost yellowish in hue, but on a cloudy day like today all she sees is muddy greenish-brown.</p>
<h3>5. THE MARYAM-LALONDE SEPULCHRE.</h3><p><span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: It wasn't... you, you know.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I didn't do it because I wasn't happy in our marriage, or with our life, or with our child, or with you. I love you.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: I Know</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Or At Least Id Like To Believe You</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: I still do, too. Even if I've made my mistakes.</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: Do Try To Get Some Sleep Rose</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="kanaya">KANAYA: We Shall Discuss Whether Or Not Our Marriage Survives This Tomorrow</span></span></p>
<h3>6. POSTSCRIPT.</h3><p>A few weeks later, Jade receives a call from Kanaya's number. She answers. But when she does, she hears Rose's voice on the other end. Rose says no greeting, just asks one tired question.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="rose">ROSE: Well, Jade, what do you want to name her...?</span></span><br/>
Jade, sitting on the front step of her house, stifles a sob through lugubrious toebeans.<br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i...</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: i dont know yet rose</span></span><br/>
<span class="text"><span class="jade">JADE: ill worry about it later</span></span></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If you'd like to yell at me on Twitter, you can do so @ <a href="https://twitter.com/Headlessjulie">HeadlessJulie</a>. Thanks for reading, and JadeRoseMary forever.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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